Sarcasm Ink

Always give 100%. Unless you’re giving blood. STREET TEE

Am I perfect? No. But do I try my best and keep a positive attitude? Also no. STREET TEE

Back in my day Tinder was how Kiwis liked their steak. STREET TEE

First I drink the coffee then I do the stuff. STREET TEE

FORD because John Wick didn't kill all those people for a Chev. STREET TEE

Friday is my second favourite "F" word. STREET TEE

I don’t like morning people or mornings or people. STREET TEE

I got called pretty today, well actually it was "pretty annoying", but still. STREET TEE

I had my patience tested, it came back negative. STREET TEE

I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you. STREET TEE

I ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life I’ll be notified immediately. STREET TEE

I used to be a people person, but people ruined that for me. STREET TEE

I used to care, but I take a pill for that now. STREET TEE

I'm awake, please respect my privacy during this difficult time. STREET TEE

I'm no cactus, but I know a prick when I see one. STREET TEE

I'm on a vodka/tonic diet. So far, I've lost 3 days. STREET TEE

I'm sorry I don't take orders, I barely take suggestions. STREET TEE

I'm that friend you should not put on speaker phone. STREET TEE

If I ever say, "do you want me to be honest" say no. STREET TEE

In my defence, I was left unsupervised. STREET TEE

Notice: Due to rising costs Dirty Deeds are no longer done dirt cheap. STREET TEE

Of course your opinion matters, just not to me. STREET TEE

OK I'm here, what are your other two wishes. STREET TEE

People who tolerate me on a daily basis, they're the real heroes. STREET TEE

Shut up Liver, you’re fine. STREET TEE